I Shot The Sheriff...But Wait Til I Shoot These Bitches Down, Down

Lately, I have been questioning internally if I have a bullseye on my forehead that says:
"Please, start shit with me."

Last week, I spoke to Mr. Man's daughter's mother. What to call her...what to call her...from here on out we will refer to her as I.G. (Ignorant Girlie) so...that sounds like Iggy if you say it out loud which is what I have generally done to her and her antics (although, she almost had your girl get on her level. Let me fill y'all in...

On Thursday night, I was getting dressed and ready to go to church. I was in a good mood. Scratch that - I was in a great mood. I heard my phone ringing and ran to go grab it. A small sidebar is that, Mr. Man's phone/internet was cut off by ATT when he tried to switch to Vonage, and as a result he was left phoneless and internetless. At the time, we were anxiously awaiting a call from this job he applied to. Desperate to get the phone call, we both agreed that it would be a good idea to forward his calls to my phone. From experience, I know Mr. Man doesn't get too many phone calls - mostly from family, and as for I.G. he normally called her rather than have her call him. Anyway, I picked up the call, not recognizing the number. It's not something I normally do with my own cell phone - but seeing as how I'm paid up with all of my bills (smiles) answering my phone is a little less of an inconvenience. Also, I knew that all calls to my phone weren't technically for me, so I answered.

I heard nothing on the other line. So I say again, louder, and more clearer "Hello?" I hear a polite sounding female voice on the other line.

I.G.:"Hello? Can I speak to Mr. Man?"
Me: "Um, he's not with me right now. His phone isn't working so he's having his calls forwarded to my cell phone. I can give him the message when I talk to him though."
I.G.: (after small period of silence) Um, who is this? I mean - I'm not trying to be rude, but this is I.G., his daughter's mother...is this RealDealRevolutionista? My daughter mentioned your name...
Me: "Yep that's me and I've heard a lot about you guys."
I.G.: "Well this is kind of awkward...um can you just tell him to call me because his daughter wants to speak to him?"
Me: "Yep, I can do that - "
I.G.: "-"Yeah we're getting ready to go to church-"
Me: "Actually - so are we, so I'll see him shortly,and I'll let him know to call you as soon as he can."
I.G.: "Okay, thanks, bye."
Me: "Bye."

Perfectly pleasant. I was even beginning to wonder internally if Mr. Man overexagerrated I.G.'s ignorance. I silently wondered for only a few moments more, before hearing Mr. Man knock on the door. I asked him to step in the house for a moment as I put my heels on. I told him that I.G. called. He asked what she said. I said not much really - except that she said his daughter wanted to talk to him. We got in the car with his uncle and he borrowed his uncle's phone to call her back. When he called I.G. is approximately when the shit hit the fan. Did Mr. Man speak to his daughter that night? Uh- no. Apparently I.G. wanted to pick that time to talk about how 1. she didn't know his phone was off (lie #1 - I was there when Mr. Man called her over the weekend to tell her) 2. how she should have known his calls were being forwarded and 3. felt "uncomfortable" with the situation (that his calls were being forwarded to ME). He hung up on her as he should've. Don't call under false pretenses - you said his daughter wanted to speak to him - if you have beef about other things and need to discuss other things you need to be a woman and just say what's on your mind. But - she knows Mr. Man won't entertain conversation of any kind because he's severely uninterested in anything she has to say that doesn't involve their daughter directly. I've heard there conversations (well his part of them) and I've actually told him that he could be a little more friendly. I, initially was on her side because I felt that for some reason we had both seen something truly unique in Mr. Man to fall in love with him. I mean, how different could we possibly be if loving him is the one expereince we both happened to share? Silly me, Trixx are truly for kids, because this past weekend I learned how different we are.

That night, she called at 1:00AM in the morning and left a message (Mr. Man strongly instructed me to not answer any more of her calls and to store the number in my phone so I would know not to answer. I.G. is literally listed as Do Not Answer. ) saying how she thought the phone would be fixed (lie #2 -if I told you at 7PM that the phone was disconnected, and you call me at 1AM, what phone man did you think would come fix it?) and how he needs to call her because his daughter wants to speak to him. Friday morning, she called me twice, and left another message, asking me to please tell him to call because his daughter wants to speak to him. He spoke to her on Friday, a little after that.

Sunday night, she calls THREE times in a row at 12:30am talking about how she thinks its BULLSHIT she has to "go through me to get to him" and that he needs to call and talk to his daughter and blah blah blah - she threw in the word BULLSHIT enough times for me to get pissed - so pissed I started to call her back and cuss her ignorant ass out because I had had enough (finally). That morning at 6ish I called Mr. Man's uncle and told him that I knew it was butt ass early in the morning but I needed to speak to Mr. Man right away. I told him that I.G. called three times and left a fucked up ass message on my voicemail. I was real ready to get on her level. This (to me) wasn't a situation that needed drama in any capacity. But I was fed up because she's manipulating the situation by saying your daughter needs to talk to her dad, but all YOU wanna do is try to figure out WHO is this chick answering his phone? And I can even understand her frustration if I was ignorant towards her. Save the drama for Baldwin Hills - this shit isn't about you I.G.! Mr. Man let me get out my frustration, and said he would not only cut off the call forwarding (the phone would just be disconnected) but he would call her - not to discuss the situation because he felt there didn't need to be a discussion. In his words - he wasn't about to explain his decisions to her because that wasn't her business - the only thing they need to discuss is his daughter, period.

I couldn't really get too upset because it was blatant that I.G. was bugging because whoever I am to Mr. Man (ahem, fiance, ahem)I'm obviously important enough to answer phone calls. And that means calls from his family (who I'm all cool with) and anyone else. She knows that he trusts my judgement, but more importantly my behavior to even accept a phone call and messages from her ignorant ass without stooping to her level. And as much as she might have left him, and walked away - they have a child together and she will always have SOME interest in who he's with (whether she'll admit it or not) because they do share a child. What did irk me was the blatant lying she did to me. First, she said, her daughter told her my name. WRONG. Her daughter doesn't know me - and even if Mr. Man mentioned my name to her, he wouldn't have said my full name, and even if he DID, he wouldn't have pronounced it incorrectly - which she did. That's two lies in one sentence. So what made me uneasy was that she knew who I was - but I don't know how. I can only assume that perhaps she has a facebook page or has a friend who has one, looked up Mr. Man, and saw the relationship status. Which - is pretty damn stalkerish - but to each their own. I can only hope I had a fly ass profile pic up there- because I'm gorgeous! In the end, I had to laugh the situation off - and be glad that I passed the test with flying colors.

Work is as ignorant as I.G.. The females at my job are really gunning for me. I went in to work today and checked my email. Why did one of my subordinates (HeffaGirl) send my boss a two page email about how a student cussed her out and how she felt a supervisor (i.e. me) should have intervened. Um, no. First rule in customer service is just to service the customer and ignore their behavior. Feeding into it means they are going to continue to behave in that manner because they have an audience. So yes, I was more focused on decreasing the line rather than focusing on licking your wound. *Ick* How about, if you hadn't given her misinformation, she wouldn't have started acting out in the first place? Did she reveal that part of the story? Of course not. *rolls eyes* Then today, it was all HeffaGirl could do to no tell StankGirl about the situation. I killed that part of their day though, lol. I ended up taking a late lunch, and went to the back, knowing that they were prolly going to be back there cutting up and what not. I politely sat with my information for school, my salad, and ate. LOL. Their whole rotation was thrown off, lol. My boss didn't even respond (at all) to the email (which made me laugh even more).

I mean, what is with females these days? My friend Kim put it best by telling me that it must be something I'm doing because I'm keeping these chicks up at night worrying, and wondering about me. Like I always say, don't watch me, watch TV. :-) I've been through way worse than ignorant mess like this, and it isn't enough to trouble me. I still have a job. I have a family that loves me (regardless of how they act) a wonderful relationship, and I am learning with each day how to strengthen my relationship with the Lord. My world isn't perfect, but for now I'm good.