So I guess this will be a series of rants, ponderings, and other things.
I'm in Willowbrook, IL. Didn't quite make it to Lake Geneva. Next time I guess. I'm with Mr. Man. He is sick. Insert sad face here.
Thanksgiving has come and gone. I hate the holidays for the most part. My faith says we aren't supposed to keep the holidays anyway (long discussion about the Lord's Holy Days which don't include Easter, Thanksgiving, or Christmas, but instead Passover, Day of Atonement, etc.) But I hate them because they are a super big reminder that my dad isn't here anymore.
Speaking of which his one year anniversary was just a few weeks ago. It seems crazy to me to call the day he passed an anniversary, but at the base of the word anniversary (annual) it is what it is. I miss him. I have yet to seen his actual grave. For those not in the know, cemeteries up here are straight janky. He's (allegedly) buried in one of the two cemeteries up for investigation for moving folk's remains to make rooms for new remains of course without notifying the families. :/ Yeah, janky, like I said.
So, while I am pretty certain he is where he should be, one can never be absolutely sure. Which is heartbreaking. I've just about told myself that isn't really him anyway. At least not how I remember him. And if I take that to be true, why go to a cemetery?
This is going to be random, just remember I warned you all.
I had a wonderful breakfast with my friends from high school yesterday. It is always so fun to get up and see how we've changed, stayed the same, and see what our futures bring.
Mr. Man took some pictures of he and I before the rest of my friends got there. I saw a really cute one of he and I being quite affectionate. I posted it as my fb profile pic. Idk about the rest of you, but when I post a picture, and someone posts a comment, it is automatically sent to my email address. Well, no sooner than I posted the picture, my brother had posted a comment that said "SIMP". When I clicked on the link leading back to my picture, it had been deleted. Now mind you, I haven't been home in at least 24 hours since I'm out of town. I called home and asked if he had something to say to my face. He gave me some bullshit about how he "hates" profile pictures of people with their s.o. on fb. He claims its weak and they normally break up shortly after. I don't know what bothered me more; the fact that my brother thinks that I'm simping, the fact that he had the nuts to put it on fb, or the fact that he would disrespect me like that. I guess my mom found out and told him to delete the comment. I guess my whole thing is - who fucking cares? Last time I checked I was too damn grown. I'm not going to lie, the shit fucked up the rest of my day for no real reason. I'm just sick of feeling like I owe somebody an explanation. It's like, if you have something constructive to say than say it but otherwise, get a damn life.
Done venting I guess. I wish Mr. Man wasn't sick. It's far too early for me to be in bed and the fact that he thinks he's sick is not making me want to crawl into bed anytime soon at least without Lysoling a nig. I'm just saying.
Deuce.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comments:
Lysoling a nig, though? lol
as it relates to your father, i feel you. but like my grandmother told me, the only thing present at the cemetery is there bodies. (if that). their spirit is everpresent so you dont have to visit the cemetery to feel closer to them, only sadder (well, thats how it works in my case lol theres not many uplifting things at a cemetery ya know? lol)
as far as your brother, like you said-constructive criticism is best. if its just criticism, it cost you nothing-pay him no mind. easier said than done, but you can do bad by yourself and clearly youve found a way to do good with someone else so his (ya brothers) opinion need not apply.
Post a Comment