Dirty Money

Happy New Year! (Even though I don't really celebrate it, I'm surely blessed to have made it through another year) That's a humbling moment all on its own...

Moving on from the humility (its a passing thang :), I've got some things to sort through (as usual!) because I am just a bundle of nerves and thoughts so here we go:

I scored a face to face interview at the institution I was talking about a few entries back. :) It's a great feeling! Until I started doing what I always do, when something happens...

I think.
and think.
and think some more.

You see this image? The scales and the balls? That's my mind. I immediately thought, pros and cons (given a successful interview and subsequent job offer). And of course I'm conflicted. I complain a lot about my job because I am one of the few people who can just go somewhere and work, and leave. I care about the things that happen because I care about how it affects my students. I care about the work that I do, because these are people's lives and dreams on the line. I love my job. I get to meet and interact with new people every day. There is never a dull moment. I don't care for my co-workers all the time, but hell they could be a hell of a lot worse. And I do love my boss, in the office and outside of the office. He's a good man, who believes in me and has given me leeway since I've started there to pretty much do as I please. He lets me go to school (and he doesn't have to). He understands that I will no longer work on Saturdays (because of the Sabbath) and has never pressed me on the issue. I know what I do, I love what I do, and I couldn't ask for a better, more understanding boss.

On the flip side, I'm cursed with caring too much about the politics of it all. That is what is draining sometimes. I would like to make some more money also, because I do work really hard. With a new job comes new responsibilities, as well, I have no idea how those responsibilities will cut in on what free time I have to myself. I need a job that still allows me considerable flexibility to pursue my entrepreneurial non-profit ventures. I can't necessarily do that in an administrative position.

But I do want more money, lol.

But more money for what? I'm officially debt free. I live at home (for the moment) and most likely will for the next few months, considering that my mom is giving me more freedom in some areas. And anyway, I pretty much do what I want when I want money wise.

More money would be nice. More money to save, invest, and even plan for my future with, but right now, more money isn't a good enough reason for me to potentially leave the job I have. And it was from this perspective, that I respectfully declined to interview for the Registrar position. Ultimately, my dream is to teach, and I should be wrapping up these classes in about two years. I don't want to switch my job completely for merely 2 years. I just don't wish to lose focus on what I'm meant to do. And sometimes, I enjoy and welcome the struggle.

Peace.